- For the 1960s band, see Love (band). The term is also used in
tennis.
Love is a very vague word in English.It can
mean an intense feeling of affection, an emotion or emotional state.It can mean to act in a way which considers someone else`s needs as more important than
your own. It can also be used to describe a feeling of attraction towards a person in a romantic and/or physical sense. This is sometimes called romantic love to distinguish it from affection between family
members or friends or between human beings and their pets. Love is also a deep liking for something (anything). Special love is a
special affection for someone or something, a feeling or emotion. Unhealthy love is the sharing or desire to share
something which would not be good for you or the object of your desire.
Various different types of love exist. Dignity is a self love. Friendship is a simple love. Family can be a lifetime of love.
You can love by helping your neighbor. Anything you share is love. You can share time, goals, problems, activities. You can love
your children or parents. You can love for a lifetime, or you can show a little loving friendship for a moment. Anytime you share
with another, you are expressing love. That is the commonality. Opinions vary on how to define goodness or good love:
- love between family members: parent's love of children, etc.
- love of friends
- romantic love
- sexual love, also called lust,
- loving one another in general, helping the homeless, or a wounded animal
- loving something abstract or inanimate, like an idea or goal
- loving one's principles, one's nation or home country (patriotism), one's life (dignity), one's honor and independence (integrity)
- loving God or one's Ishta-Deva (chosen
deity), also called devotion
Some languages, such as ancient Greek, are better than the English at
distinguishing between the different senses in which the word love is used. For example, ancient Greek has the words
philia, eros,
agape, and storge, meaning love between friends, romantic/sexual love, unconditional (possibly sacrificial,
unreciprocated) love, and affection/familial love respectively. However, with Greek as with many other languages, it has been
historically difficult to separate the meanings of these words totally, and so we can find examples of agape being used
with much the same meaning as eros. At the same time the ancient Greek text of the Bible has examples of the verb agapo being used with the same meaning
as phileo. Hebrew contains the word 'ahavas' for 'affection' or 'favour' but
most notable is the word 'khesed', which basically combines the meaning of 'affection' and 'compassion' and is sometimes rendered
in English as 'loving-kindness'.
Psychological views
In an attempt to explain the commonalities and differences of the many types of love, Robert Sternberg has suggested a view of
love involving three elements: intimacy, passion and commitment. Different stages and
types of love can be explained as different combinations of the three elements. The combinations are as follows.
- Liking (Friendship) - intimacy
- Infatuation (Love at first sight) - passion
- Empty love (Charity) - commitment
- Romantic love - passion + intimacy
- Companionate love - commitment + intimacy
- Fatuous love (Whirlwind romance) - commitment + passion
- Consummate love - commitment + passion + intimacy
As a person develops their relationship with a loved one over time, the relative strengths of the elements tends to change.
Generally love will start off strong in passion but weak in the other elements. However as time passes, the other elements may
grow and passion may shrink -- this depends upon the individual. So what starts as Infatuation or Empty love may well develop
into one of the fuller types of love. Likewise when a person has known a loved one for a long time, passion may fade, changing
love from Consummate to Companionate, or from Romantic love to Liking. Note
that the feeling which Sternberg terms passion is similar to, if not the same as, that termed limerence by Dorothy Tennov. Sternberg states that a relationship based on a single element is less likely to
survive than one based on two or more.
Religious views
The Unification Church defines love in
philosophical terms as "the emotional force given by the Subject to the Object." The church classifies love into three types:
- parental love
- conjugal love
- children's love
Different cultures have deified love, typically in both male and female form. Here is a list of the gods and goddesses of love
in different mythologies.
Quotes about love
-
- Love is a smoke made with the fume of sighs,
Being purged, a fire sparkling in lovers' eyes,
Being vexed, a sea nourished with lovers' tears.
What is it else? A madness most discreet,
A choking gall and a preserving sweet.
- - William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet, act 1, sc. 1.
-
- Much ado about nothing
- - William Shakespeare
-
- And remember, my sentimental friend, that a heart is not judged by how much you love, but by how much you are loved by
others.
- - Professor Marvel, Wizard of Oz
-
- The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.
- - Eden Ahbez
-
- Love: A term which has no meaning if defined.
- - John Ralston Saul, The Doubter's Companion
-
- Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by the removal of the patient from the influences under
which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized
races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its
ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.
- - The Devil's Dictionary, Ambrose Bierce
-
- Love suffers long, and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave
rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears
all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails....And now abide faith, hope, love, these
three; but the greatest of these is love.
- - The Apostle Paul, 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a, 13 (New King James Version)
-
- Tell me why the stars do shine
Tell me why the ivy twines
Tell me why the sky's so blue
And I will tell you why I love you.
Nuclear fusion makes stars to shine
Phototropism makes ivy twine
Rayleigh scattering makes sky so blue
Sexual hormones are why I love you.
- - Fortune file
See also:
Human love
Other types of love (philias)
Wiktionary
External links
References
- R. J. Sternberg. A triangular theory of love. 1986. Psychological Review, 93, 119-135
- Dorothy Tennov. Love and Limerence: the Experience of Being in Love. New York: Stein and Day, 1979. ISBN 0-8128-6134-5
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